cartographicbird:

brogigayo:

subwayfares:

my landlord just referred to my girlfriend as “your, your associate, your fellow tenant” when asking me when she was going to move out

MY ASSOCIATE

your business partner, if you will

subwayfares and partysoft inc include a wide range of services including taking me to wegmans and mocking me

my landlord just referred to my girlfriend as “your, your associate, your fellow tenant” when asking me when she was going to move out

MY ASSOCIATE

lizardsenjoyinglife:

eqiunox:

Author: pioneerka

enjoying bringing you a flower

paraphrased:

partysoft:

ethanwearsprada:

i think it’s a universal truth that everyone in our generation takes pluto’s losing its planetary status as a personal offense

i don’t

me either

well uh you guys are gonna have to pick another generation to identify with then >:|

unfuckyourhabitat:

Leave no dish behind!

This week, focus on making sure every dish, clean or dirty, ends up where it should be, whether that’s in the dishwasher, in the sink (and then washed), or put away once it’s clean. No abandoned drinking glasses on the coffee table, no used coffee mugs on the counter. Dishes get returned to their rightful place this week.

softy asked me to put this up here. I wrote it New Year’s Eve.

imagineyourotp:

Imagine your OTP just moved in together and are going about their usual morning routines, though both are pretty awkward and shy about it. Person A is in the shower and doesn’t realize that Person B has hopped in as well. Person A turns around and totally flips out, but Person B just grins and says, “Mind if I join in?”

imagine how quickly person A can dump person B and kick them out of the apartment :’)

jof:

toomuchdaydreaming:

meme-rage:

She Wanted to Be the Wolf

Parenting, you’re doing it right.

How can you not smile at this? 

my gf does not like tea

any tea

under any circumstances

I am making us both a cup of tea to deal with my intense feelings about this.